Bethesda Softworks (PS2) Game ••½ Graphics/Sound ••

Even with a pleasantly cocky vocal performance from Johnny Depp, this movie-turned-game is like going to the dentist with a pirate. There are cavities (painfully repetitive swordplay that lends nothing to the hack 'n' slash genre), yellowing of the teeth (drab visuals), and that awful waiting-room music (your 5.1 rig won't even break a sweat). Besides, why would you ever want go to the dentist with a pirate?

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